first day anxieties//OPEN

[layla sophia woods]

The new school year was beginning and Layla’s stomach was already in knots. It was no secret that she didn’t deal with anxiety well. She had a bad habit of thinking of the absolutely worst possible ending to each situation. Negativity was a big part of her life. She didn’t mean for it to be and she didn’t want it to be that way, but she just couldn’t help herself. Layla often tried to keep her negative thoughts to herself, though. Besides, in regards to most other people’s problems, she tended to have a fairly positive attitude about things. It was her own problems that brought out the negativity.

It was the first day of classes and she just left her last class of the day: music theory III. She loved the class because, unlike her high school music theory teacher, this professor explained things so well and so clearly. It was a class that she had gone into college absolutely convinced that she would hate. It wasn’t her absolutely favorite class now, but she didn’t dread it like she had before. The only thing she didn’t like about it was the fact that the professor often had the students go up to the board, which caused Layla to shrivel into a bundle of nerves.

Layla’s feet led her to the public library, which was very near to campus. She still didn’t understand why the school didn’t have its own library, but at least this one was close. Carefully avoiding any eye contact, she grabbed the first table she saw and pulled out the new piano music that her piano teacher had given her that day. It was a little tricky… She wanted to get started on it as soon as possible for her jury at the end of the semester. Layla could feel the pressure build in her chest at the thought of having to play in front of the music professors…oh boy. 

[seth phillip miller]

With his very first creative writing class of his new year came a new mound of assignments. Already Seth was assigned to write a story with only one syllable words and and another with an alphabet structure, in which one sentence began with "A" and the next with "B" and so on. It looked like tonight would be spent on the library.

The walk to the library was always a loud one. The streets were normally loud, and the cars honking their horns at impatient pedestrians J-walking made it louder. Seth fortunately had his ear buds in to cancel out the noise. He always enjoyed listening to Maps & Atlases, one of his favorite bands, as he walked along the busy streets. His satchel was over his shoulder and his hands were in his pockets. It wasn't yet hot enough to be wearing layers but he was anticipating a cold and rough Chicago winter ahead of him.

The public library was huge. He loved hanging out there because he would always see people doing different things. Studying, talking in whispers on the phone or to friends, some children running from their parents excitedly, and the occasional rebellious couple who would find a secluded corner of the library to make out. Today, however, he had to focus and get some actual work done. No people watching today.

It took a couple minutes for Seth to find a spot where he felt that he would not get distracted. He walked aimlessly around the library, eyes searching, until he came across a table where a fiery red head sat. He knew this girl almost immediately by the color of her hair.

Seth smiled, pulling out his ear buds as he walked over to where she sat. "Hey, Layla," he said. He knew Layla through one of his photography classes, for they were both minoring in photography. He pulled out a chair at the table, hoping that she wouldn't mind. He felt comfortable enough around her, as he did with most people, and he silently hoped she wouldn't mind.

Tagz: layla!
Wordz: 344
Inspirationz: Tagz: chicago <3
Lyricz:Some Nights-fun.
Creditz: Tagz:by monica don’t steal plz
Notez:note note

[layla sophia woods]

Most people would assume that one should go to Beethoven Hall to work on music. Well, Layla had a certain system and she absolutely had to work on her pieces the very same each time, otherwise it would just stress her out far too much. The first step of her system was to take her piece to the library and mark it up. So, that’s exactly what she was doing. She took out a highlighter and a pencil out. Layla eyed the sixteenth notes and began writing down the first fingering pattern that popped into her mind.

Her eyes widened as she moved further down the piece of music. “No, not b flat major!” she said, eyeing the key change with utter fear. She hated b flat major! Frowning and shaking her head, she popped the cap off her highlighter and marked the key change, knowing that’d be something she was going to miss. She was really going to have to keep her eye on that.

“Uh!” she said in surprise when she suddenly heard a voice saying her name. Layla had been so focused on that stupid b flat major part that she completely wasn’t paying attention to what was going on around her. She grinned when she saw who it was. “O – oh, Seth, hi!” she said, before turning to check to see if the librarian was about to shush them or not. She brushed her bright orange bangs out of her face as she turned back to Seth. “What’re you here working on?”

[seth phillip miller]

Seth looked down at the papers in front of Layla. He knew that she was a music major, and that must be what she was working on. He always wished that he had taken up some instrument when he was younger; he had always wanted to learn how to play an instrument to make his own music. He figured the feeling had to be similar to how he felt whenever he finished a good poem, or a good story. He always felt very accomplished after doing so and could see that musicians always felt the same about their work as well.

"Oh, just the usual writing assignments," he said as he took a seat across from her and set his satchel down on the table. "What about you? Music stuff?" He nodded at the papers in front of her with a smile. He was good enough friends with Layla to know that she had some problems with anxiety. Seth always did his best to be a good friend to her when he could tell that she was having a hard time. This seemed like one of those times, so what better way to take some pressure off than by striking up a bit of friendly and fun conversation?

To be honest, Seth had a little bit of a crush on Layla. He secretly had a thing for red heads. He would never tell anyone, though. His friends would tease him endlessly about "gingers with no souls" and a lot of his good friends were red heads. He didn't want any silly attractions getting in the way of friendships. However, with Layla, Seth felt very comfortable. He did like her, but he was in no way shape or form ready to even admit he had any sort of feelings for her. He didn't want to burden her.

Tagz: layla!
Wordz: 306
Inspirationz: Tagz: chicago <3
Lyricz:Some Nights-fun.
Creditz: Tagz:by monica don’t steal plz
Notez:note note

[layla sophia woods]

Layla heaved a heavy sigh, relieved that Seth was joining her. He was one of the few people around whom she felt fairly relaxed. Unlike a lot of people, he was pretty patient when it came to her stresses and fears. “Music, yeah,” she said, nodding,”I had my first piano lesson of the semester and my teacher gave me…this…for my jury at the end of the semester,” she said, holding it up for him to see. Juries were required for most music majors – a kind of performance test. She could feel her stomach tighten at the thought of having to play in front of the music professors. Layla was used to playing in front of people, but not when she was the main focus of the performance. She usually played background music for the theatre performances or accompanied soloists.

She put her hand to her heart as she felt her heart rate speed up. “Oh, boy…I’m glad she gave this to me right off the bat. I need to get all the practice I can get. Sometimes I regret being a music major,” she said, tucking her bright hair behind her ears. When it came to playing by herself, she was often doubtful of herself. It was a common thing in the music department, though. There were only a few people that were truly confident in the talents.

“But – um, anyway,” she said, pulling her eyes away from the piece of music,”What’s your writing assignment?” She rested her head in her hand, interested in hearing. Layla was always really impressed with how Seth could come up with whole stories, plots and characters the way he did. She could never be able to do something like that. 

[seth phillip miller]

Seth smiled at her when Layla held up the music sheets. "Well, it's a good thing you're so good at playing," he said, matter of fact. "Other wise this would be trouble." He looked at his satchel at opened up the flap, sticking his arm in and pulling out a journal with a pen on the rings. This was the journal that Seth used specifically for fun writing when he had free time, never school assignments. Already he was getting distracted.

When Layla said she sometimes regretted being a music major, Seth shot his head up and gave her a skeptical look. "You'll do great, I know that for a fact," he said and let a smile creep up onto his features. He knew fairly well what Layla was capable of. He knew that she was very talented and was extremely good at what she did. Seth believed that she truly had nothing to worry about, but he knew that she couldn't help but stress.

Now it was Seth's turn to be annoyed with his homework. "Just some ridiculous writing assignments, like write a story using all one syllable words. Ya know, the usual busy work," he rolled his eyes. A lot of Seth's professors were challenging and he enjoyed them but then again there were professors like the one who had assigned this assignment, who was just looking to keep his students busy.

Tagz: layla!
Wordz: 234
Inspirationz: Tagz: chicago <3
Lyricz:Some Nights-fun.
Creditz: Tagz:by monica don’t steal plz
Notez:note note

[layla sophia woods]

Layla scoffed and rolled her eyes, but allowed a smile to break through when she heard Seth’s compliment. “Oh, please,” she said with another scoff as she waved her hand,”I’m average, at best.” Layla wasn’t overly confident in her playing, but she knew that she wasn’t the worst player out there. What really made her nervous was being in front of a group of people and being the main focus. When she was too anxious, she made mistakes in her playing and it would all just be downhill from there.

She thinned her lips and began shaking her head furiously, causing her vibrant red hair to go every which way. “No…no…,” she said, resting her music down on the table and slowly sliding it towards her,”You don’t know that.” It would be an understatement to say that Layla had a been of a negative outlook on life. According to her, if something really bad could happen, it would. So, she always tried to prepare herself for the worst possible thing that could happen in each situation. “How do you know I won’t get nervous and make a ton of mistakes? Oh my gosh, I’m going to get nervous and make a ton of mistakes,” she said, her eyes widening as she spoke. She gripped at her hair as she ran a hand through it.

“You have to write a story with just one syllable words?” she asked, raising her eyebrows. That sounded nearly impossible, to her at least. “That sounds really hard…do you know what you’re going to write about?”

[seth phillip miller]

"Oh, please," Seth rolled his eyes, playfully mocking her. "You're more than average. And I'm going to keep saying that until I get it through your head," he smirked, crossing his arms. Seth was always going out of his way to encourage Layla in any way that he thought she needed. He understood that she didn't think she was as good as she was, but he saw so much more to her than she did about herself. He onlu wished she could see it all, too.

Seth looked at her with a small smile as Layla shook her head. Her hair was everywhere, which was something he loved about her. It was like fire. "Layla," he said, skeptically. "I do, trust me," he said. "Everyone gets nervous, but I just so happen to know for a fact that you will power through any sort of nervousness and ace the jury." He winked at her. Everything he was saying was true; he truly did believe that Layla was a great player.

Now Seth was the one sighing in defeat. "Yeah," he said eyeing his journal. "Eh, it shouldn't be too hard when I get past the whole brainstorming part." Typically Seth suffered from a good hurricane of thoughts before he actually picked out the right one and started writing. It was a particular process to Seth.

Tagz: layla!
Wordz: 227
Inspirationz: Tagz: chicago <3
Lyricz:Some Nights-fun.
Creditz: Tagz:by monica don’t steal plz
Notez:note note

[layla sophia woods]

Layla thinned her lips and looked at Set wide-eyed, as if unsure if she should really believe him or not. Seth was always doing this. He was always positive about what she did in life and, while she sometimes didn’t completely believe him, she really appreciated his positivity. “Man, how are you always so positive? I need to be more like that,” she said, resting her head in her hand and slouching lazily down onto the table, looking at her music as if it were a medical report with bad news on it. Yes, positivity wasn’t exactly Layla’s schtick.

A small smile spread across her face and a tiny laugh escaped her mouth when he winked at her. “But – but you know how I am in front of people, right? I get…spazzy and...nervous!”she said, flailing her hand around. Layla’s mind really was weird when it came to performing. If she was an accompaniment, she was perfectly fine! But when the audience’s attention shifted a bit to the side and was focused on her, it was a completely different situation. “And – and how do you know I can do this?” she said, furrowing her brows and widening her eyes.

She tilted her head to the side when she heard Seth’s sighing. “Well, what sort of things do you have in mind? C’mon, bounce some ideas off me,” she said, motioning to herself before looking at him eagerly. 

[seth phillip miller]

Seth flashed a friendly smirk at Layla. "It's not hard," he grinned. "Hey, I could definitely show you a pointer or two, I mean I'm pretty optimistic and all," he let out a chuckle. He noticed the look that Layla was giving her music. He turned his head to the side, studying Layla. He was willing to do anything he could to help her realize how good she truly was.

"I know how you get," he began. "But you do great, I've seen it first hand." Seth was hoping that all of this reassurance would get through to Layla; he hated seeing her get nervous and anxious. "Layla," he said narrowing his eyes at her playfully. "You know that I know everything," his voice was loaded with playful sarcasm before he returned to his normal tone. "So trust me," he smiled.

"Eh," Seth shrugged. "Probably some mushy short story about two folks in love," he put emphasis on the word and added spirit fingers. It was an easy concept and he figured he would easily be able to come up with plenty of words to get the story flowing quickly.

Tagz: layla!
Wordz: 196
Inspirationz: Tagz: chicago <3
Lyricz:Some Nights-fun.
Creditz: Tagz:by monica don’t steal plz
Notez:note note